a bad idea today

What a wobble after wobble after wobble in my willies 

I decided to pass the time with the extra time I give in countdown to other schedules fitting in my life by gutting out another areas of squished squashed belongings ... 

Bad idea ... first the door knocks ... the guy to fit the regulations in homes ... who should have come Monday ... I also have to remind them of the asbestos ... you cannot drill in two ceilings here ...

I was on the way out with a bundle of goodies to the charity shop... 

Of course they had no ideas about said asbestos ...and already fitted other properties ... 

That it is fitted but two of the devices are going to be stuck up .... is good ...

I proceed out to drop off the goods to the charity shop and pick my Meds which were were not allowed too soon even though I wrote on it why I required them sooner ... 

I decided to vent the frustrations productively in my distress ... I requested to see the paractice manager of my doctors surgery who saw me at short notice in private ...to explain a lot of what is going on presently ... that I do not write about and my communication in my world which is not always clear enough to which I explained also ...

I explained several things and a push from them in being left afloat after the learning of the failings ... failings yet again !!!! 

And that reassurance goes a long way ... 

And I had already been distressed by what I found today ... in gutting the bedroom ... 

I have a lot happening and not ready to be left afloat ... especially December ... again ... 

Another December Approach

the wonder in where I be and the look back to see where I got to when out and about with others in the tease of my hand on my device ... The snatch of photo ... The linger in real life to take it all in .

One such time in the view above ... it ''twas too cold for my sister. She patiently waited in the car ... giving me time to absorb an experience ... a place I so loved growing up too ... a place in a country well trod in past times 

This on the coast I loved with the high waves crashing on the cliffs out of season joys in mothers natures own fury ... 

The feel of those times still with me today ...thankfully 

Time to travel

in the not too distant future and afar to be with those I know ... and meet many grumpy and wonderful travellers ...  

I have to keep an idea of the date for I have to collect my tickets from the station and pack. And in the main not get carried away in the past in remove and retrieve... 

I get totally absorbed in the silliness of it all ... The meal plans in a now difficult home 🏡 to avoid too much waste. Oh and I have my system of smoke and heat detectors to be fitted. I have to wind down the silly life and start again in the New Year ... 

Many visits, meals special and volunteering and busman retrieve and clear elsewhere planned and the spontaneous  ... the reciprocation. The healing in mixing with people out of my environment to aid recovery . 

Turnaround

in emotions

How at the programmes in health I have been on ... the biggest step is getting out of bed and out to face a day. If ya do that you feel a tad easier ....

The workout in a gym ... 

I used to walk for miles... I rather see scenery than walk in the same spot over and over again ... 

I did however have a execrsise bike (before it got lost in the mess), and watched a movie ... That was multi tasking, never one once to sit still without something in me hands or between me legs ! 

Fate in the automated

location footprint ... the coast for Cornwall, well it is actually Devonsire.  The mess in Kent ... The built up North town of Crewe in a rail hub ... how apt !!! 

A Supermoon Remembrance ...

the full swing into the term time season of goodwill ... or not! The manic panic of others to put a day together here and there in commitments of ones own life ... 

... ideally a come together and do it all together..  

I came into the festivities of Jewish ways with my first ever partner ... the Salvation Army with a life partner which is intriguing ... 

A Dutch style to Zwarte Piet a companion to Sinterklaas and when things ever get to fall in place ... a time back in the fold different in North, South and South A Western !!!! 

This day that haunts

from recesses in still, the flaunts.
twisted in journeys and jiggly jaunts,
jam packed climes, to that is now but unravelled
one has certainly done inroads, this time travelled!

50-80

is an enlightening time. The staggered process to accessing different life qualities... The health checks amore that come. The reduction in my Home Insurance just an example. The Oyster card scheme is for all in an area.The health checks not. 

A whole MOT like a car in a body scan way would be good by now. That again would be like a cattle market in those waiting rooms ... The queues in life, birth, marriage and death ... The staid way parts of this country celebrates ... records and the most stiffy spiffy uppery lippy ... ways ...

The intermix of the

industry in care in communities, residential homes, privately and career wise to eventually on a very real level ... in personal care to my own self down in dumps spiral ... has weaved in and out of this life. 

The known ambulance and fire brigade personnel as was then, nurses, Consultants and Dentists/ nurses on a personal level at times in my movement through various counties, in central and outer skirts of the city. My mum with her twin took part in twin research in a London hospital. The research and care of those that we don't know exceeding the requirements in their dedicated skills of soothe. And nurses and carers in many forms you get to know for a period of time in a loved ones care, or your own. The social workers and support workers in Cornwall when Mum and Dad fostered for a time, getting to know me although by then I had moved away. The Doctors and more of the the team in catering and getting toast out of hours, in reaches of a time that all is foggy in mind now. And those friendly porters and paramedics that and reception staff who assist so much within their capabilities only last year again, on my time in and out of A & E, and then Out Patients for an investigation in my health ... 

The social meltdown that came ... that tainted an outlook of unreserved respect I once had for professionals who spend years in study, to those that have natural instincts in care through experience at first rather than qualifications, gaining the qualifications. Those that come up through the ranks of auxiliary nurses in speed and vogue. And those that assist children torn from their home and the scars that are left from those formative years... The writing of a life story ... 

And last Christmas time spent with the young man of our daughter, who had his life story written with social workers. We sat for long moments looking at this life story too, in which he shared the poignant way that when a baby they did not at first expect him to live, let alone walk and with many operations later he is obviously thriving, walking, and obtained a degree too, to boot! ... 

Obs

in observations from others in their various locations in vocations in my life vacation... 

How unrespectful and bolshy the demands can be on you. I am entering that world after a world of triggers in that, that invaded life in the care in the community coordinates that lack ... 

The brush down and face life, that I might function in use again ... at a slower pace this time round ... to get thorough the silent marauders that inadvertently destroyed a life ... 

I will be back

in the continuing evolving work of dealing with others. This time round I am used to the ways a bit more. I do not feel the coldness so much now. 

And like my current volunteer role. The confidentiality is key. The current role I have been trained in has a little bit of acting involved. You also needs to be unbiased. It has been good grounding in the intermix of my relationships back with the world. 

I now know what it is like in the vocation, out of the vocation, as a client myself and the carer of a loved one ... 

A multifunctional aspect of all the tangible feelings for all involved ..